Sad Day…

Last Sunday, January 7th, 2006…
I went to Scripps Green Hospital in La Jolla to visit my grandmother. She has been battling cancer the past 3 years and has recently taken a turn for the worse. Her doctor had informed my family that my grandmother’s condition is so severe that she will not be able to recover and there is nothing else they can do for her except make her as comfortable as possible. I couldn’t hold back the tears when I’d look at my grandmother. There was a moment when I was at her bedside; I was holding her hand…my eyes poured with tears as I watched her smile and look at me. She was so happy to see me and my family. The doctor had told us that her time with us would be sometime between 72 hours to one week…my parents made preparations to get all of our family members from all over to get here to visit and say their final goodbyes…

I returned to work keeping everything boggled in…a smile on the outside…a tortured heart filled with pins on the inside. Tuesday, they transfered my grandmother to a Hospice in Riverside near my uncle’s home. I had work, and Riverside is a bit of a long drive, so I was not able to visit.

Sunday, January 14th, 2006…
My cousin called me this morning…my grandmother passed away. I was speechless. I couldn’t speak nor react. It seemed as if time had stood still. My cousin was explaining what was going on, what had happened, and what our family is now doing to get together. I could hear Samuel Barber’s Adagio for Strings playing softly in my mind as his voice faded into the background. With a trembling voice, I ended the call with my cousin. The strings came to a stop…I looked at Pooh…and began to cry.

It was my day off so Pooh and I drove to Riverside to visit my family. I am very lucky to have Pooh in my life. He is there for me in happiness and in sadness. He is my protection…and my comfort. He’s what makes my life worth living.

The drive to my Uncle’s house is an hour and 45 minutes.

I don’t like driving there because it’s not that great of a scenic route…they live in the middle of nowhere.

(such a great view from the freeway….yea…its not so great actually)

We arrived at my uncle’s house in Riverside. Most of my family and relatives were there. Everyone seemed very happy, yet there was still a sadness in the air…it was a strange calm that normally isn’t there when we have family get-togethers. To make things worse, the Chargers had lost to the Patriots…my relatives were VERY upset.

Everyone was smiling but you could tell they had been crying earlier because of the look in their eyes. All of my relatives were trying their best to make sure I was ok. When my grandfather had passed away when I was in highschool…I took it very very very badly. I was in a dark place, full of pessimism and depression. It was a very low time in my life that I had even attempted to take my own life. Anyway, that is a completely different post so I’ll move along now.

After watching an upsetting football game, eating lots of Filipino Food, and greeting my relatives…Pooh and I headed home. We went to a nearby shopping center for a couple shots of espresso and then hit the road.

Pooh and I had a nice car ride home…i cried…and he held me close.

I’d like to say to all my readers….
life is random…it’s full of ups and downs, smiles and tears…but it’s precious. Live your life like every moment might be its last, and always keep your loved ones close to you. Take the time to tell your family, your significant other, and your friends…that you love them. I am very glad I have this blog to record and share random yet precious memories of my life.

I love you Pooh…I don’t know what I’d do without you.